Book Challenge 2016

Anyone who knows me well, knows how much I love to read. Earlier this year my then office mate and I decided to embark on a book challenge adapted from one I had seen on bustle.com. Besides adapting some of the categories we also decided all the authors needed to be female. What an incredible experience it has proven to be. I don't think we truly realize how much we stick to one genre of reading and if not one genre then then overlapping similar ones and styles. I have had my imagination and mind stretched and learnt so much. So here are my results for the book challenge 2016:

CATEGORY:	FEMALE AUTHOR	RATE
AUTHOR U25	White Teeth, Zadie Smith	4
NON-WESTERN HISTORY	The Rape of Nanking, Iris Chang	5
BOOK OF ESSAYS	I Feel Bad about my Neck,Nora Ephron	4
BOOK ABOUT AN INDIGENOUS CULTURE	Celia's Song, Lee Maracle	5
READ A BOOK BEFORE YOU SEE THE MOVIE	The Taliban Shuffle, Kim Barker	5
YOUNG ADULT BY AUTHOR OF COLOUR	Brother, I'm Dying, Edwidge Danticut	5
SET IN THE MIDDLE EAST	Reading Lolita in Tehran, Azar Nafisi	5
WOMEN IN WAR	A woman soldiers own story, Xie Bingying	4
GRAPHIC NOVEL	Through the Woods, Emily Carroll	3
ABOUT AN IMMIGRANT/REFUGEE TO THE USA	The Bonesetter's Daughter. Amy Tan	4
LIFE LESSONS OR "SELF HELP"	Wonder, RJ Palacio	5
(AUTO) BIOGRAPHY	Infidel, Ayaan Hirsi Ali	4
MEMOIR BY LGBTQIA	Why be happy when you can be normal, Jeanette Winterson	4
POST-APOCALYPTIC	Who Fears Death, Nnedi Okorafori	5
SCI-FI FEMINIST	The Handmaids Tale, Magaret Atwood	4.5
FIRST BOOK IN A SERIES	The Parable of the Sower, Octavia Butler	5
SET IN AFRICA BY AN AFRICAN	The Icarus Girl, Helen Oyeyemi	4
A TRANSLATED BOOK	The Japanese Lover, Isabelle Allende	5
CONTEMPORARY COLLECTION OF POEMS	Colossus and Other Poems, Sylvia Plath	3
BY A MODERNIST	Nightwood, Djuana Barnes	3
SHORT STORIES	Something I've been Meaning to Tell You: 13 Sories, Alice Munro	3.5
RECOMMENDED	Asunder, Chloe Aridjis	4
EXTRA NOVELS (JUST BECAUSE)	The Cursed Child, JK Rowlings	4
	Leaving Time, Jodi Picoult	5
This has truly been an awesome experience and now for the same categories but with male authors....	Gone Girl, Gillian Flynn

Its Been Too Long...

I cannot believe its been about 4 years since I last posted. All I can say is that from a positive start my life in Saudi Arabia turned into a life-changing deeply reflective time. I had always said I wanted to meet myself in a dark alley with no defenses and that's definitely what happened. I had to confront my most inner demons and garner more resilience than I ever thought I had. I discovered parts of myself that I wish had stayed hidden and others that I just love.

Saudi gave me the gift of being truly completely alone and in that "alone-ness", which should not be mistaken for loneliness, I met my dreams, hopes and fears. I learnt to cry again, to belly laugh and to dance naked madly when I was alone. My inner Goddess is awake and thriving.

In many ways I know I have some residual PTSD from the conscious lived reality in Saudi Arabia and this is evident in the mere fact that I stopped writing. I will process the practical experiences later when I am ready. I am sure that there is a book waiting to be born but I don't want to relive any of it just yet. All I can say is that as a western woman I could never have pictured the horror that it was on every level.

For the last 18 months I have been living in Oman and I can truly say that I have found the place that truly makes my heart sing. I will always be proudly South African and my soul is African, but in this space I feel safe and "at home" in a deeply emotional way. I will never not ache for my family, that is a given, but I have given myself permission to let go of the guilt of being away and to embrace who I am and to truly keep growing and developing. I am also fervently letting go of binary thinking. It does not have to be either...or. That is so limiting. I am a committed loving mother, truly present in my children's lives and physically distant all at the same time.

I finally give myself permission to just be... I am not my sacrifice. I don't need to be a martyr and I certainly never to conform to be worthy of love. I just am looking out while looking in on one hell of a ride.